The Health Crisis No Ones Talking About

Audio Podcast Accompaniment: https://spotifyanchor-web.app.link/e/kIYGoZqB2Kb, https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-new-health-crisis-no-one-is-talking-about/id1724993213?i=1000660970665

Video Podcast Accompaniment: https://youtu.be/xfNEQi7qNZw

48% of Americans are struggling with this one specific health metric, which if neglected, could be as dangerous as smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day.

Did I get your attention?

Good! Now take a deep breath, there’s a relatively simple fix.

It may not be an easy fix, but it is simple

That fix is spending more time with other people.

In recent years the US Surgeon General declared that we are quite literally in an epidemic of loneliness.

That may seem dramatic, but the findings are concerning when you look at the data.

And I know what you may be thinking:

“When am I supposed to grow a circle when I’m working just to survive”

“Where am I supposed to make new friends? I like to keep my work and home life separate”

OR maybe you fall in the same category that I did… “I’d rather have 3 high-quality best friends than a group of people I can’t go deep with”.

And to that, I now think:

It’s so easy to think in black and white.

There’s less friction and less discomfort.

But as we talked about in a previous newsletter, comfort is at the root of so many of our issues.

So what are these health ramifications and how can we be proactive?

I’m glad you asked,

Let’s get into it.

I. The Epidemic of Loneliness

In 2023, the U.S. Surgeon General released a document titled, “Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation”.

It’s an 82-page PDF discussing why our social health is declining, the ramifications, and how we as individuals and a society can heal our social health.

As stated in the document, dozens of studies have found that social isolation and loneliness increase the risk of morbidities (diseases or symptoms of a disease) from cardiovascular diseases.

It was also found in data from 16 different longitudinal studies (long-term studies that observe the same variables) that individuals with poor health are 30% more likely to have heart disease and or strokes.

Not only that, but for the parents and aunties/uncles reading this, children who experience isolation are more likely to experience adult obesity, high blood pressure, and increased blood glucose levels.

All things that can negatively impact our quality of life.

Interestingly, a common thread I found was that the data seemed to correlate more with perceived loneliness not only time alone.

This means those of us who prefer solitude may not experience the same risk factors as those who feel alone.

And each person may need a different amount and quality of interaction to experience the same levels of radiant social health.

This concept is what Kasley Killam, MPH, Social Health and Connection Expert refers to as our “social health style”.

Understanding how we perceive our daily interactions, who we interact with, and how much interaction we experience may be the key to improving our social health, helping us experience a life where we thrive instead of simply survive.

II. Understanding Your Social Health Style

We’ve all heard of introverts and extroverts, but, for me, I never felt like I fit neatly into either of those categories.

I hate small talk, but I don’t hate being around people.

I love going deep with people but doing that every day would drive me crazy.

These characteristics would place me closer to the lower right quadrant what I call “The canyon explorer” or what Kasley refers to as a “firefly”.

The “Introvert” Types:

As previously stated, the Explorer is fired up by less frequent and deep interactions.

On the other side of the introvert coin are our Farmers market folks. They love less frequent and casual interaction. These people may love having small talk with a handful of people…

~Likely because they know those interactions are not going to last long~

The “Extrovert” Types:

The Snorkeler is the life of the party, they love to be around large groups of people and engage in more casual small talk. This lights them up.

While the Scubadiver loves to go deeper. They love frequent and often times cerebral conversations. Instead of listening to music or a podcast on their daily commute, they take that time every day to catch up with their loved ones.

____

Once you find which category you align with the most, do a little self-assessment.

Are you engaging in the type of interactions that make you happiest?

Conversely whichever category made you cringe is likely a category you should stretch yourself a bit to spend time in too as both the quantity and quality of your interactions are important for your social health.

III. Your Next Steps

After taking stock of your social health and seeing where you need to improve, you may find it helpful to utilize the following framework created by Kasley Williams.

1. Stretch

   1. If you find the quantity of your connection is low go out of your comfort zone to join some new groups.

2. Rest

   1. If your quantity feels too high for you, chill out. Spend some time with yourself, go for some hikes, spend more time in prayer and meditation and if you have a person you’re very close to who revitalizes you, feel free to do these activities with them.

3. Tone

   1. If the quality of your connection is low, spend more time with your loved ones, have a game night with your friends, or go back to that group you love that you’ve spent way too much time away from.

4. Flex

   1. If the quality of your connections are high keep doing what you’re doing and do your best to sustain the quality of your relationships.

You can read more about this by checking out this article.

If you’re feeling skeptical about the impact of connection, I understand.

In a society that glorifies not asking for help and “grinding it out”, it’s definitely a mindset shift.

However, I can tell you from personal experience it’s a game changer.

The past couple of months I’ve prioritized making new connections regardless of having my “solid 3”

I realized that was just my excuse to avoid doing the work of building new relationships, so I made tiny shifts.

For example, after giving a compliment to another woman in a cute outfit, I’d spark up a conversation.

Or after Jummah (Friday congregational prayers for Muslims), I’d go further than just giving my salaams (a greeting of peace) to the woman next to me. I’d introduce myself, and literally just ask where she was from.

If the conversation stopped relatively quickly,at least the next jummah I’d see another friendly face, and that in and of itself can help you feel like you’re more a part of a community.

Although I use the word “friend” sparingly, these tiny shifts have allowed me to make genuine connections with a handful of women in the past couple of months.

And those connections have led to some of my favorite memories in the 3 years I’ve lived in SoCal.

I feel more connected, energetic, and less stress.

The beautiful thing about community is that you have others to share the load of life with you, and that can make a world of difference.

If you’ve gotten this far, thanks for reading.

It feels good to be back and sharing the cool things I find throughout the week with you guys.

If you’re into podcasts and want to learn more about social health, you can check out this interview with Kasley Killam on The Proof with Simon Hill.

She also has a new book out that I can’t wait to read called, “The Art and Science of Connection: Why Social Health Is the Missing Key to Living Longer, Healthier, and Happier”

Introverts….it looks like we gon’ have to be “out here” this summer…

InshaAllah we got this 😭✊🏽

As always,

Abundant light and radiant health

Assalamualaykum 💕